In stories, characters rarely travel in straight lines. Irrespective of whether they’re following a map, prophecy or a goal, something or someone always interrupts the main journey, pulling them sideways into unexpected places and quests.

Day-to-day life is not much different. We set a direction, start climbing our mountain, and then something/someone pulls us off-trail. Sometimes it’s chosen, other times it’s forced, but often it doesn’t feel optional at all. Yet, almost always, it becomes meaningful.

Side quests in books (and life) are usually delays, detours, pauses, chance decisions or distractions, but they are important in the sense that the character will emerge as someone capable of the main quest. While they can be unexpected, inconvenient or uncomfortable, they are never wasted. A side quest can be a temporary job, a healing period, a pause to care for someone, a new relationship, a project ‘just for now’, or a personal crisis. There may even be times when the side quest transforms into the main path – when detours reveal a path we hadn’t previously considered, but it turns out to be exactly right, more aligned and more honest.

Matt Haig’s book, The Midnight Library, is a beautiful example of how much impact a side quest – or making one different choice – can have on a life. In the book, Nora finds herself between life and death in a library of infinite possibilities. Each book she opens lets her experience a life she could have had – careers she never pursued, relationships she didn’t build, and adventures she never took.

“Between life and death there is a library, and within that library, the shelves go on forever. Every book provides a chance to try another life you could have lived.” – The Midnight Library, Matt Haig

Not everyone will understand your side quest/s. Some may think you’ve ‘lost the plot’, or you’re ‘wasting time’, but these comments reveal their fear, not your truth. People who misunderstand your detours are usually:

• afraid of taking their own
• uncomfortable with ambiguity
• invested in you staying predictable
• projecting their insecurities
• unaware that growth often looks chaotic before it looks clear

Your role isn’t to convince them. Your role is to continue your story. Side quests don’t need outside approval to be valuable. Not everyone understands your internal timing, personal transformation, or story arc.

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.” – The Road Not Taken, Robert Frost

Think of a detour you’ve experienced recently…

• How did it revisit a lesson from your past in a new way?
• How did it turn out to be meaningful?
• What is one thing your side quest has taught you that will guide your next step?

If you’re ready to integrate your side quest and get back on track:

• Acknowledge what it gave you – insights, clarity, stamina, a boundary, a relationship, skills, or perspective.
• Take a small next step – you don’t need the whole plan.
• Release the idea of ‘lost time’ – you weren’t lost, you were learning.
• Re-enter your path with new insight – your main journey may not be the same, and that’s perfect because you’re not the same person.
• Let the transition be gradual – heroes don’t leap from the side quest to final battle.

Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash